[{"bf_titre":"Autoportrait ESS\u0027perluette","bf_source":"","bf_url":"https:\/\/essperluette.opale.asso.fr\/65e1f4fbd0fde\/edit","bf_tags":"","bf_accroche":"Questionnaire \u00e9val structure","bf_essentiel":"32 propositions pour mieux comprendre en quoi votre activit\u00e9 rel\u00e8ve de l\u2019\u00e9conomie sociale et solidaire et trouver des ressources permettant d\u0027aller plus loin.\r\n\r\nCet autoportrait permet \u00e0 la fois de poser un regard sur ses propres pratiques et son fonctionnement, et identifier les points \u00e0 am\u00e9liorer dans une logique de d\u00e9marche de progr\u00e8s.\r\n\r\nY r\u00e9pondre n\u00e9cessite de prendre son temps pour avoir le recul n\u00e9cessaire sur son activit\u00e9.\r\n\r\nL\u0027outil ESS\u0027perluette est compos\u00e9 de 5 parties : vous pouvez r\u00e9pondre \u00e0 chacune dans l\u0027ordre de votre choix. ","bf_auteur":"Laurent","id_typeannonce":"46","id_fiche":"AutoportraitEssPerluette","date_creation_fiche":"2024-03-01 16:34:12","statut_fiche":"1","imagebf_image":"","fichierbf_file":"","bf_bookmarklet":"","date_maj_fiche":"2024-03-01 16:34:12","user":"82.65.9.168","owner":"","html_data":"data-bf_accroche=\u0022Questionnaire \u00e9val structure\u0022 data-bf_auteur=\u0022Laurent\u0022 data-id_typeannonce=\u002246\u0022 data-id_fiche=\u0022AutoportraitEssPerluette\u0022 data-date_creation_fiche=\u00222024-03-01 16:34:12\u0022 data-statut_fiche=\u00221\u0022 data-date_maj_fiche=\u00222024-03-01 16:34:12\u0022 ","url":"https:\/\/cocotier.xyz\/?AutoportraitEssPerluette","-is-external-":"0"},{"bf_titre":"Men\u2026 I\u2019ve Always Been Obsessed With Them","bf_source":"","bf_url":"","bf_tags":"","bf_accroche":"","bf_essentiel":"{{attach file=\u0022dreamstime_s_72058801.jpg\u0022 desc=\u0022I\u2019m still giving men who don\u2019t deserve it\u2013\u2013and sometimes don\u0027t even know it\u2013\u2013my time, energy, and my power.\u0022 size=\u0022big\u0022 class=\u0022center\u0022 caption=\u0022image dreamstime_s_72058801.jpg (41.8kB)\u0022 nofullimagelink=\u00221\u0022}}\r\n\r\n\/\/**It\u2019s not him, it\u2019s the version of him I\u2019d chosen to focus on, ignoring all the bad behavior which followed, as I have way too many times.**\/\/\r\n\r\n\u201cAddicted to Love\u201d is a great song\u2013\u2013it\u2019s also a not-so-great running theme in my life. Last week, at 62 \u00bd, it dawned on me that there\u2019s never been a time\u2013\u2013nary a day of my life\u2013\u2013when I haven\u2019t had, first a boy, then a man, front and center in my brain. Attempting to add up the hours\u2013\u2013the real estate\u2013\u2013and what I might\u2019ve done with both had I been more focused on me\u2013\u2013rather than them\u2013\u2013is depressing as hell. \r\n\r\nI can remember being a little girl of not quite 8, chasing 10-year-old Andy Helfman\u2013\u2013all day, all summer long\u2013\u2013for at least three years running. I eventually caught him and got the chaste kiss I sought, and the satisfaction of discovering he liked me, too. Returning to the city from the Catskills, there was Roy. I picked him on the first day of school; in June he asked me out. I fell for Paul when I was barely 12. I harbored that love for years until he returned it, in his fashion\u2013\u2013breaking my heart and hymen. There was Lenny\u2013\u2013unrequited; with Randy, I came to wish it was unrequited; Vinny #1, and then Vinny # 2\u2013\u2013both mine for the having, and both exceedingly inappropriate.\r\n\r\n\u0022\u0022\u003Ccenter\u003E\u0022\u0022**Sponsored Ads**  \r\nLooking For Online Love? Try Loveawake Free Dating Site:  \r\n[[https:\/\/www.loveawake.com\/free-online-dating\/Norway-dating-service.html?page=14 Meet Online Love In Norways]] | [[https:\/\/www.loveawake.com\/free-online-dating\/Sweden-dating-service.html?page=14 Swedish Lover And Dating]] | [[https:\/\/www.loveawake.com\/free-online-dating\/Finland-dating-service.html?page=14 Find Love in Finalnd]] | [[https:\/\/www.loveawake.com\/free-online-dating\/Denmark-dating-service.html?page=14 Find Online Love In Denmark]] | [[https:\/\/www.loveawake.com\/free-online-dating\/Netherlands-dating-service.html?page=14 Find Dutch Love Partner]] | [[https:\/\/www.loveawake.com\/free-online-dating\/Belgium-dating-service.html?page=14 Belgium Love Online]]\u0022\u0022\u003C\/center\u003E\u0022\u0022\r\nI sound insanely fickle. And yet, I was fairly easy on the fickle, heavy on the insane. These were not short impetuous crushes. I harbored all of them well past their expiration dates, either until I got them or until the next one took hold, oft with some heart-breaking overlap.\r\n\r\nLooking back\u2013\u2013how much of my quest was about the conquest? The chase. Winning. Ownership. Not to amass bounty, but to capture\u2013\u2013love. To fill a hole, to prove my worth\u2013\u2013which I could never seem to do with the people I deemed most important, including my rarely-considered self. I never thought of it in those terms\u2013\u2013yet now\u2013\u2013it\u2019s impossible for me not to see the pattern.\r\n\r\nHow many times have I given my time, attention, and power to a guy who either didn\u0027t ask for it, didn\u0027t appreciate it, or used it more as a means to control rather than love.\r\n\r\nI followed one boyfriend to the college of his choice, and another, post-degree, to the city of his\u2013\u2013in both cases putting aside my own desires. I married the second one, knowing he was a volatile alcoholic. But, he was my volatile alcoholic. I waitressed, putting my career on hold, so he could\u2026 sleep. So what if there were holes in the walls behind every picture? You couldn\u0027t see them, so I could pretend they weren\u0027t there. I spent the majority of our years together obsessing\u2026 about how to get away from him.\r\n\r\nIt took falling in love with someone else to manage it.\r\n\r\nMy second marriage grew from a years-long professional friendship. The romance was built on mutual respect, affection, and ultimately, love. In my mid-thirties, almost immediately, I shifted my focus from my career to managing his and to starting a family. It was my choice, my great privilege and pleasure. For a decade, as his star ascended, our kids blossomed and thrived. When his up came crashing down, it took our love with it. We spent the next 10 years struggling over what once was, trying like hell to get it back\u2013\u2013unsuccessfully. Graciously, the kids continued to bloom\u2013\u2013magnificently.\r\n\r\nAs a middle-aged single mom, without a career or a man, I obsessively struggled to find both. My long-starved creative passions swiftly found their voice and vision, and have met with some success. The money and the manhunt have been an exhausting, heartbreaking, ego-crushing exercise in futility. In spite of all the years, and lessons learned, I\u2019m struggling to find my way with both. I\u2019m still giving men who don\u2019t deserve it\u2013\u2013and sometimes don\u0027t even know it\u2013\u2013my time, energy, and my power. And, there\u2019s always a man\u2013\u2013and a way to stalk him.\r\n\r\nBack in the day, I did it with the phone: I\u2019d call the object of my desire, hear his voice, or,sometimes hell-forbid, his parent\u2019s voice, and hang up. I graduated to the walk-by\u2013\u2013finding any excuse to pass his house, or where he hung out, in hopes of catching a glimpse\u2013\u2013a smile\u2013\u2013or a moment of his time. What a waste of mine.\r\n\r\nFacebook, Twitter and, Instagram took my occasional insanity and turned it into an ongoing opportunity to \u201ccheck-in\u201d on the latest object of my obsession affection.\r\n\r\nDating apps are an even bigger nightmare, with distance offered at any given moment. Twenty-three miles? Hey! Where the hell are you?\r\n\r\nFinally, two weeks ago, I freed myself from the now daily insanity. Julian, my latest (mind) fuck, doesn\u2019t utilize social media (talk about insanity). I had no way to monitor him other than to glimpse What\u2019s App to see when he\u2019d last been on. Why exactly? What did I gain by such behavior? Heartache. I knew when he was communicating, I also knew it wasn\u2019t with me.\r\n\r\nI tried weaning myself from looking, but just as it was with pot 17 years ago, I had to quit cold turkey. I\u2019ve stuck to it for 14 days, and it\u2019s working. As each day passes with zero connection, he fades from my mind, and perhaps more importantly, from my heart. With distance, the rose lenses are clearing their hue\u2013\u2013less obstructing my view. I\u2019ve come to appreciate that I\u2019d been romanticizing him, focusing on the alchemy of the connection, whilst ignoring the harsh cruelty of the abrupt disconnection. It\u2019s not him, it\u2019s the version of him I\u2019d chosen to focus on, ignoring all the bad behavior which followed, as I have way too many times.\r\n\r\nFor the first time in memory, there\u0027s no man in my head. I\u0027ve stepped away from the swipe. That leaves a lot of time and space to think about worthy people, ambitions, and causes\u2013\u2013and maybe, at last, to include myself as one of them.","bf_auteur":"Laurent","id_typeannonce":"46","id_fiche":"MenIveAlwaysBeenObsessedWithThem","date_creation_fiche":"2025-06-02 15:49:10","statut_fiche":"1","imagebf_image":"","fichierbf_file":"","bf_bookmarklet":"","date_maj_fiche":"2025-06-02 15:49:10","user":"185.107.162.250","owner":"","html_data":"data-bf_auteur=\u0022Laurent\u0022 data-id_typeannonce=\u002246\u0022 data-id_fiche=\u0022MenIveAlwaysBeenObsessedWithThem\u0022 data-date_creation_fiche=\u00222025-06-02 15:49:10\u0022 data-statut_fiche=\u00221\u0022 data-date_maj_fiche=\u00222025-06-02 15:49:10\u0022 ","url":"https:\/\/cocotier.xyz\/?MenIveAlwaysBeenObsessedWithThem","-is-external-":"0"},{"bf_titre":"YesWiki Pro","bf_source":"","bf_url":"https:\/\/yeswiki.pro","bf_tags":"num\u00e9rique,laurent","bf_accroche":"","bf_essentiel":"","bf_auteur":"Laurent","id_typeannonce":"46","id_fiche":"YeswikiPro","imagebf_image":"","fichierbf_file":"","bf_bookmarklet":"","date_creation_fiche":"2024-02-27 12:33:55","statut_fiche":"1","date_maj_fiche":"2024-02-27 12:41:37","user":"WikiAdmin","owner":"WikiAdmin","html_data":"data-bf_tags=\u0022num\u00e9rique,laurent\u0022 data-bf_auteur=\u0022Laurent\u0022 data-id_typeannonce=\u002246\u0022 data-id_fiche=\u0022YeswikiPro\u0022 data-date_creation_fiche=\u00222024-02-27 12:33:55\u0022 data-statut_fiche=\u00221\u0022 data-date_maj_fiche=\u00222024-02-27 12:41:37\u0022 data-owner=\u0022WikiAdmin\u0022 ","url":"https:\/\/cocotier.xyz\/?YeswikiPro","-is-external-":"0"}]